Day 7 – Another one bites the dust

[In case you missed it, don’t forget to read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, and Part 5!]

The memories of my mornings are all beginning to blend together now. I recall turning on the night light, throwing on clothes, and heading to the meditation hall. Breakfast was always an adventure, as I tried to make something new each day. I was really getting into the routine of things now. I was not nearly as bored when I had breaks, and meditation was coming more easily to me now. I still had difficulties, and times when I just seemed to have no concentration at all, but progress was definitely being made.

This morning when I got to the hall for group meditation, I noticed that crazy hair was no longer there. Crazy hair sat just behind me, and suddenly a thought occurred to me. As I meditated, occasionally (and if you know me, you know what “occasionally” means in this instance) I would have to let out a toot! Keep in mind that I had been on an all-vegetarian diet, but a diet that included gas-inducing vegetables such as leek, kale, and onions. The toots I was producing were often more fragrant than most people would prefer. And by “more fragrant” I mean that if I was in a room with a small child and farted, I could easily render them unconscious or ill with a single *toot.* Needless to say, as I sat there getting ready to meditate, the thought that crossed my mind was: What if she asked to be moved because she could no longer stand the smell?! Horrified, I looked around to see if Crazy Hair had been relocated to a new cushion. There were a few empty ones, as some people cracked under the pressure and left before the course was finished.

With a sigh of relief, I saw that she was, indeed not here. Being me, I immedately wondered if she had smelled the toots that had been trapped in my little meditation pillow as I sat there. I’m quite sure that when we had finished a meditation session and I got up from my cushion for a break that some toxic gasses seeped out. Sorry fellow meditators!! Can’t help it!

Speaking of gas… Today another person got a nickname. As we all sat there meditating in silence, often people would have to sneeze or blow their nose. There was one lady that went above and beyond. I called her “Burpy McBurperson.” There were times where she would burp every few seconds for a good 5-10 minutes. I sat there thinking: She should get that checked out… or perhaps eat her food more slowly. After Burpy McBurperson was named, her burping outbursts were FAR more funny to me. Sometimes, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing when Burpy started on a gas-expelling run.

On the afternoon of day 7, I realized something else – Versace had left the building! I had a hunch that Versace wasn’t going to make it to the end of the ten days. I had it in my mind that if she did make it to the end, that I was going to congratulate her on making it! I must admit that I was not very upset when I noticed Versace was gone. Versace was known for her coughing fits, for making strange moaning and sighing sounds when she meditated, and for usurping all of the teacher’s time at breaks and noon. Either way, part of me felt sad that she hadn’t made it. I really hope she comes back and tries again!

Day seven ended without many out of the ordinary occurrences. I was definitely getting used to the routine. And at the end of the day, when I heard Goenka start his video with the customary “Day seven is over. You have three days to go,” my head didn’t sink down with worry about how I was going to make it. Instead, I had a proud moment of joy that I had made it this far. It’s a good thing that I had all this positive energy surrounding me, because on day eight I was going to need all the positive energy I could get!

[Continue reading in Part 7]