I have some special treats for you this fine Friday! During a recent trip to a Dollar Tree with my girlfriend and her
evil twin, I found some absolutely fantastic products that I felt necessary to document and showcase! Some of them are just cute, but others are downright shocking! Who knew you could find such treasures on the shelves of a dollar store! Keep your eyes open, you never know what you’re going to find. Let us begin the journey…
There are many scintillating Dollar Store foods! Among them are these fun-sounding beverages: SHASTA! Just saying it out loud makes you smile! There are fun flavours like Shasta Twist and Shasta Cola. They even come in diet! Experience a range of nuclear neon colours that may or may not match the flavours listed on the bottles or cans! It’s a crap-shoot, but heck, it’s 3 for a dollar!
Next up: Cleaning products! BANG cleaner caught my eye with bright purple bottles and explosively designed labels. No doubt made from a mixture of corrosive chemicals, BANG cleaner provides the stay-at-home mom the satisfaction of shooting stains DEAD! Caution: while using this product, please wear a hazmat suit and heavyweight chemical-resistant gloves! Works well to dissolve unruly children. Totally AWESOME!
Next up in cleaning products: Nice’n Fluffy. Wash everything you own with these cancer-causing chemicals and they will come out fluffy and puffy! Apparently, from the picture on the box, Nice’n Fluffy is great at scrubbing lawns and pine trees! It has also been known to add flavour as well as FLUFF to mashed potatoes! Get it in your eyes, and you won’t be seeing anything… but you’ll feel that your face is fluffy and puffy from chemical burns!
Gumball FAIL: The label distinctly says Gum BALLS, however, there are some suspicious Gum SQUARES in this package! I actually found this one at a Homesense, but it deserved an honorable mention.
In the craft aisle, we found these special characters! What better to bring to the bingo hall than your Mini Pecker and your Little Pecker. Stand proud in the middle of the bingo hall and whip out your Little Pecker for all to see! These specially packaged dabbers come in a range of colours – from penis pink to blue balls!
The prize-winning find from this trip has got to be the bingo dabber that swears! OH SHIT! I’m not sure what the logic is behind this bingo dabber – nor why they allowed it to get onto shelves with curse words clearly on the label! Doesn’t that stay-at-home mom on the label look angry? Probably because she hasn’t picked up her BANG cleaner or Nice’n fluffy yet, and the kids are screaming as she shops around the Dollar Tree for her favourite bingo dabber colour. Oh Shit! Green is my lucky colour, and they only have red and blue….