That’s right… I have super powers. Above and beyond my normal state of gracelessness, trips and falls, and stuffing my foot in my mouth repeatedly, I have several special talents that I believe to be super powers. Now maybe they can’t help feed the starving, or initiate world peace, but they’ve got to be good for something! Here’s the list:

  1. I can stop myself from sneezing with the power of my mind
  2. I can cause others to yawn by making fake yawn noises or saying ‘yawn’
  3. I can turn off my tickle feelings at will
  4. If I eat beef, I become a biological weapon
    beef farts
  5. I can wiggle my nose like a bunny…

What are your superpowers? We all have them…